The Story Behind the Firing of a Liberal Blogger
I'm sure you are wondering how did it come to pass that a white Press Secretary named Snow come to use a racially obscene and offensive phrase like Tar Baby. As you know, I was hired as the Press Secretary several weeks ago. My first press conference did not go well as I quickly found myself in an altercation with George Will. Soon after that I threatened to tie a microwave to Dick Cheney's chest and he was none too happy about it.
My short stint as the White House Press Secretary was an interesting one and I got to meet a lot of good people. I have to admit, Scott is a nice guy and helped me during the transition. We celebrated his “resignation” and in a drunken stupor confessed to me that he has seen the mark of the beast on President Bush. I investigated and found it to be true but I’ve signed a confidentiality form and cannot provide any additional information. But I can say without a doubt, that Bush is the spawn of the Devil.
Anyway, Bush wasn’t cool with me going after his boy. But there is more. My Secret Service briefing took longer than normal and I missed my bus. Condi offered me a ride so I figured since Condi rolls tight, I figured I might as well chill with a sister on the way to the pad. Well, Condi tried to hit on me, and you all know Jaimie and I are tight like that so I had to pass. Condi got pissed. The next morning at the Cabinet briefing she lied and told Bush I tried to mack her. Bush didn’t like that. So now I had two strikes against me and I hadn’t even gotten in front of the press to make up for my last press conference.
After the Cabinet briefing, the First Lady and Bush’s mom came through to welcome me to the West Wing. Barbara started snooping around my office and I kindly told her to chill the (four letter word) out. Barbara gave me this evil look then commenced to whoopin my ass. Now, y’all know I’m from the Windy City and we don’t take that, but I can’t hit on an old lady. I pushed her off of me and she just happened to knock the First Lady to the ground. It was on then. They jumped me. Barbara threw a couple body blows that knocked me off balance. That's when Laura came over the top and bust me in my mouth. I started yelling real loud trying to scare them saying, 'I'm from the Chi tricks, get off me. Get off me.' It was talking major trash when they called in this 300 pound agent. He yelled at the top of his voice, SHUT THE F** UP'. I'm from Chicago... no body tells me to shut up... but I shut the f*** up.
Bush called me to his office and I tried to explain what happened but he wasn’t hearing it. He cussed at me and that’s when I snapped and slapped the hell out of him. Two hours later I was packing my bags and they got Tony Snow to replace me. The bastards still haven't sent me my last pay check.
So how do you think I feel when I look at the news and see Tony Snow use the term Tar Baby?
Courtesy of Crooks and Liars
VIDEO OF PRESS CONFERENCE
Video-WMP Video-QT (rough transcript)
Who in their right mind would ever use such a term in any context? It doesn’t make any sense. I’m kind of pissed. They fire a liberal black man and hire a closet racist (or at best a white man that doesn’t have a clue – but my money is on him being a closet racist).
Well, what can you expect from a man who’s last name is snow? But I'm open to working with the administration again. With all of the investigations taking place, I'm sure I'll have another opportunity.
And now you know... The rest of the story.
Talk About It:
1. Is the use of Tar Baby offensive (tongue in cheek)?
2. Should Bush fire Tony Snow?
3. Is this ignorance or racism on Tony Snow's part?