It's Worth It

Jaimie and I have been living together since April. I moved from Chicago to be with her and her daughter. It was a risk but I felt that in order for our relationship to move forward, I could not continue to commute from Chicago to Los Angeles every three or four weeks.

Outside of family, she is the first woman that I’ve ever lived with. As I’ve expressed on this blog, I am what many would consider a Neanderthal. That is slowly changing, thankfully. I appreciat having groceries and not having to purchase new silverware because everything in the kitchen was dirty.

This past weekend my best friend asked was it worth. What he wanted to know that is it really wanted to know if being a family man worth the freedom I gave up as a single man. How did it feel to no longer come home and watch TV for six hours? How did it feel to have the responsibility of the world on your shoulders and having to answer to someone else? How did it feel to wake up on a fall Saturday and know that I wouldn’t be able to watch 14 hours of college football?

I pondered his question for about a nano-second and told him that it was well worth. Although Stella isn’t my biological daughter, I can see the influence that I am having on her. She’ll watch football, although for only about ten minutes, but it’s a start. She refers to soda as pop (getting teary eyed). We have a special game called Spaceship. That’s when I sit her in my arms and fly her around the house, run into the bedroom where there are pillows stacked on the bed and I toss her into the air. Sure, it isn’t the safest game in the world, but she has yet to miss the runway. Of course, she’s getting heavier so I’ll give this game another ten pound and I’ll move on pee-wee football (something her mother is against but if I can keep her more interested in interceptions than lip gloss for the next three years, she’s playing football.)

As for Jaimie, there are days when I just annoy the hell out her. I wish I wouldn’t but that is something that just happens. Men, you feel me on this. Some days I just can’t do a damn thing right. I’ll have to blog on it one day. But we always find a way to come back together. I don’t have any friends here in LA so Jaimie is it for me. She won’t watch football with me but she lets me have that time. (Read Jaimie’s take on sports here: http://thediaryofjaimie.blogspot.com/2005/11/sports-suck.html

If you read her blog you can tell that we have different interest, but she’s my Doll and she really does allow me to me. Except for leaving pizza on the stove for four days.

So, I tell my friend that it is an amazing thing to be in the role of man of the house. It is a role that I am still learning to perform, but at this point there is no other place that I would rather be than here in LA living with two females that have completely transformed my life.

This past weekend Stella was gone for three days. Now, I’m use to her leaving for two days to visit her father but three days was definitely too long. So yesterday she comes into the house and I of course have the Bears game blasting. She knows that I do nothing until the Bears game ends but there was a look in her eyes and a feeling in my stomach and at that point the only thing I wanted to do was hang out with her and her mother. So, I turned the game off and we went to Santa Monica Pier. During that time a friend called me and she was for certain that she was interrupting my game. When I told her that I was at the pier she started laughing and told me that I’ve changed. “Yes I have,” I told her. “I’m a father figure now.” It feels good to say that. So I will tell any man that focus on the horror stories – get over it. Because when it is all said and done. It is worth it.

Note: I did have my brother call me and give me updates on the scores. And I did ask the bartender in the restaurant where we ate lunch to turn from Pool to Fox Sports so I could see the highlights. Hey, I’m still a football fan.

 

16 Responses to It's Worth It

  1. Dell Gines Says:
    Your coming around...keep moving to the darkside of the force brother...
  2. Rashid Muhammad Says:
    I guess that's the advantage of being a huge baseball fan over a huge football fan. Baseball games are a little easier to turn off because the team plays 6 nights a week as opposed to a weekly affair.

    But of course that makes it that much worse when the playoffs come.

    Anyhow, congrats on taking that step.
  3. Jaimie Says:
    Thanks!
  4. Cynthia Says:
    Congrats to you and Jamie.

    It seems like everybody I'm visiting is talking about relationships. You can always tell when relationships are new...
  5. Dan-E Says:
    "Some days I just can’t do a damn thing right."

    this is so true. so, depressingly true.
  6. nikki Says:
    that story makes me feel all warm inside! now i just want to go and hug a teddy bear or something.

    glad to see you representing...and finding a way to do it while still remaining true to your football roots.
  7. Jo Says:
    *sigh* you're so awesome... and so is jaimie... I think I'm in love with you both ;-)
  8. NewYorkMoments Says:
    Congrats!!!!!!!!!

    Hey...Do you know any nice guys in NYC???
  9. Revka Says:
    James,
    That is the first picture i have seen of you. You are handsome, and your girlfriend is totally beautiful. Of course her daughter is as well. You are too goodlooking to be a democrat. What is wrong with you!!! :)
  10. Rell Says:
    man, it's gonna be hard for me to part with my football whenever i find that someone.

    Lord knows... what if it was a playoff game? I'm scared just thinking about it...

    but yea i echo cynthia's sentiments, congrats on being in love and together :-)

    At age 23, i've given up.
  11. DCS Says:
    I'm thrilled for you and Jaimie. You seem to complement each other well. Continue to be happy.
  12. Shirazi Says:
    Reading your blog (and Jamie's), let me sum up for you: Lucky. The change is good. Better start learning to do things right.
  13. Jaimie Says:
    @ Rebecca: That is not me, James, or my daughter in that pic! I look nothing like that! I was laughing that James even picked such a photo because the family looks soooo boring!!!

    Thanks anyway!
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